Retirement and Work-Life Balance is B.S.

Retirement and Work-Life Balance is B.S. - Relentless Dentist Podcast

What comes to mind when you hear the term “work-life balance”? How about when you think about retirement? I get a fair amount of questions about these two topics—likely because this podcast is all about engineering a practice that provides for your epic life—but I’m here to tell you that I think both work-life balance and retirement are complete b.s.

In this episode, I go on a bit of a rant about why these two ideas really bother me. Listen in to hear why I don’t agree with the thought that we should have a clear distinction between work and the other aspects of our lives, the reason I think retirement is a bad idea, and how we should all go about designing lives that give us purpose and fulfillment.

Key Quotes:

  • “Is ‘work-life balance’ implying that one is bad and that we should balance it with the other one? I don’t know—I have a hard time with that. Most people get their purpose and a lot of their identity from their work.”
  • “Why can’t we have a vision that blurs the lines between work and play?”
  • “I think that’s a common theme in 100% of people, that you should be growing and evolving and serving. And most people do that through their work.”
  • “My life is fueling my work, and my work is fueling my life. So can we just all call it life and integrate it?”
  • “I, quite frankly, want to work the day before I die. I want to work until the end, delivering value.”
  • “You’re serving the patient by being influential. You’re serving your team by giving them a culture, a place that they enjoy and collaborate and have a shared vision. All those components fuel your life.”
  • “Five years we’ve been talking about designing an epic practice to fuel your epic life. It’s a vehicle to get what you want—to live the life that you want—but it all has to be engineered with intention.”
  • “Can we stop talking about retirement, and can we stop talking about work-life balance? I think they’re both complete bullshit, and I think they take people down paths that they shouldn’t even consider.”
  • “Design a work schedule that gives you purpose, that gives you meaning, that gives you challenge and allows you to grow, and let that fuel your life.”

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Dictators and Daily Disciplines

Dictators and Daily Disciplines - Relentless Dentist Podcast

In this episode Dr. Dave Maloley sits down with Dr. Mark Costes to share some valuable tips on practice leadership, life balance and maintaining motivation and focus on the daily disciplines. The two discuss how to harness your dark side, the impact of mortality motivation, what dictates the upper limit of your practice and much more.

Dr. Dave talks about some painful lessons he has learned along the way and how he stays centered. He shares some really valuable techniques to hold onto motivation, lessons learned and focus without letting it slip over time. Dr. Dave also talks about how to use passion as a rocket booster in your life and which areas you should make sure you’re ‘trending upward‘ in.

Key Quotes:

“It’s not whether or not you ever make a bad decision or misstep. It’s what happens in realizing you made a mistake and what you do with that information.” – Dr. Mark

“I think the practice needs to provide you with things other than, you know, a definite paycheck, consistency and ability to grow as a leader – and that’s to influence and impact others.” – Dr. Dave

“I think there’s a lot of guilt that goes into dentistry when you’re not completely engaged.” – Dr. Dave

“I’m grateful for the journey because it’s only made me stronger going through it.” – Dr. Dave

“Most of us are a blend of personalities but we have a dominant.” – Dr. Mark

“We need to serve our practice and our patience, no doubt, but we need to engineer it in a way that it’s serving us.” – Dr. Dave

“Realizing it could all end at any time is sometimes the ultimate motivation.” – Dr. Dave

“When you have an idea, it doesn’t have to stay an idea – It doesn’t have to stay an idea with enough action and vision.” – Dr. Dave

“At some point, no matter how much we’re rocked, we can get sucked back into that whirlwind and forget how important those lessons were.” – Dr. Mark

“Are we going to be victims of this or are we going to use this to strengthen our relationships, to increase the way we view the world, how we’re going to come at the world when we have future challenges. So did this happen to you or for you.” – Dr. Mark

“If you stick with the fundamentals and stick with the vision, anything is possible. It’s just a matter of time between point A and point B.” – Dr. Dave

“We’re swinging for home runs when the magic is really in daily disciplines and installing new habits.” – Dr. Dave

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Hey Jude and Your Epic Life

Hey Jude and Your Epic Life - Relentless Dentist Podcast

One of the most common questions received on this show is how to organize and engineer a high-performance life. In this episode, Dr. Dave will be giving you an inside look at his 4×4 epic life matrix that he uses to design and keep his life on track. He explains not only how to use it but also gives examples based on how he fills out and uses his.

Dr. Dave breaks down the basics of this model by explaining the different elements that go into it, such a: values, experiences, development, giving and much more. He shows how these different areas of your life can be categorized, mapped out and organized in a way that is efficient and highly effective.

Key Quotes:

“How do we find the magic moments in each day to feel truly grateful for.”

“I can have whatever I want as long as I can get really clear on what I want and put forth the energy to execute it.”

“As a high-performance coach, I’m coaching my clients in 5 categories: clarity, energy, courage, productivity, and influence.”

“Oftentimes I got to the target and it didn’t necessarily make me feel the way that I wanted it to feel.”

“Who you think you are is really how you interact.”

“If we don’t engineer this stuff, we can spend a lot of time in stress, anxiety, depression, and discontent.”

“I actually have a list of people in this category that I want to make sure I’m investing in.”

“I want to make sure I’m giving and I’m serving in a proper way.”

“I’m not looking for mastery now, I’m looking for incremental improvements.”

“High-performance coaching is uninstalling these limiting beliefs and installing powerful habits and rituals.”

“We’re chasing other peoples’ versions of success. Take some time and make your own.”

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Influence and the 80-Year-Old Man

Influence and the 80-Year-Old Man - Relentless Dentist Podcast

Today’s episode is all about the power of influence and living in a way that inspires others to do their best work. Leadership is all about figuring out who we have to become for our teams, and it’s up to us to ask ourselves if we’re really walking the talk—or if we’re all talk.

Inspired by his father’s recent 80th birthday party (where celebrating the way his father has lived his life drove home the fact that making an impact is all about integrity and honoring your word) Dr. Dave discusses why we all need to think about how we’re showing up in our practices. Listen in to hear what he says makes a great leader and his advice for all dentists to level up their lives, as well as their practices.

Key Quotes:

  • “Leadership is influence; nothing more, nothing less.”
  • “If you want hard workers, be the hardest worker in the room. If you want integrity, you have to honor your word and do what you say.”
  • “If you walk a straight line, if you practice what you preach if you develop a mission and core values that are very clear and you embody those values, it may take some work, but you’re bound to have a team that supports you in that mission, that vision, and those values.”
  • “As dentists, we often get wrapped around, how do we do this? What’s the strategy? What’s the recipe? Because that’s how we’re taught dentistry. … But leadership and running a practice and having an epic life is much different from that.”
  • “I think it’s important that, first, we know exactly what we want; that’s the clarity piece of high performance. Then, it’s important to know why we want it.”
  • “Goals are important, but the who—who do you have to become?—is probably the most important strategy to leveling up your life and leveling up your practice.”
  • “Think about what you want from your practice. Get that clarity. But realize who you have to become, what sort of leader and influencer you need to be, and start walking that.”

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The Influential Dentist Series with Dr. Chris Phelps – Part 1

Quotes & Notes:The Influential Dentist Series with Dr. Chris Phelps - Part 1

  • Everybody needs a coach, no matter how successful you are. For me, my best coach has been something called the Strategic Coach.
  • From a clinical side, there is very little I don’t do. But now I focus my time, because I have two offices and six doctors that work for me, so the patients I get are bigger cases. So my time in the clinic is more productive.
  • When I heard Dr. Cialdini speak for the first time, I had another one of those moments, like holy crap, this is the answer. And I have to go learn the answer, and this guy has it figured out.
  • The thing I love about this stuff (Dr. Cialdini’s research) is number one it is based in science.

Dr. Cialdini, what he did, is he figured out these principles which are so suddenly simple but yet so powerful.

  • The powerful thing about it is that it works no matter what. The key to remember is that it is a universal concept; these six key principles are present no matter what society you’re from, what culture you grew up in, what part of the world you grew up in, they still apply.
  • We’re looking for the first satisfactory clue or indication to make a good decision, and this decision basically has to have two criteria. It’s got to be a good decision, and it has got to be gone, meaning once we make it we don’t have to circle back around and deal with it again.
  • We as clinicians and business owners, we have to be very careful about how we use these things. Because we have to protect our credibility and our authority with our patients in our practice.
  • We try to recommend you be in all three of these areas, then you know you are safe and totally ethical in whatever it is you are trying to use the principle for: Is it true? Is it natural to the situation? Is it a net win-win for both parties?
  • There are seven things we are going to talk about, the first of which isn’t really a principle, but it is a powerful phenomenon called the contrast phenomenon.
  • Then we will dive into the six principles of influence:
          1. reciprocity
          2. liking
          3. consensus or social proof
          4. authority
          5. consistency
          6. scarcity.

Be sure to check out the next episode in the series with Dr. Phelps, which will air tomorrow.

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